Explanations and favor

This is the first time I have experienced the formalities of a Korean funeral.  I don't think I was expecting to be this taken by it in this way. 



example picture, use one from

jjagun abpa



In my last post I uploaded a picture with captions saying I would be in a suit for 3 days.  Korean customs are very different than in America or the west.  Firstly, instead of having an open casket viewing for one day, we have two days from early morning to late night of people coming to pay their respects in a room with a memorial for the deceased.  A portrait is set in the middle with floral arrangements made around it.  The larger arrangements set around the room are from different churches and people.  People come into this room to pay their last respects to the deceased and the family.

The family of the deceased will dress in black.  The sons of the deceased wear a black and white ribbon on the left side signifying their sonship and later will add a white sleeve to the left arm with two black bands in the middle.  The grandsons wear a white sleeve on the left arm with a single black band in the middle.  The women wear a black hanbok (traditional clothing) with a small white ribbon in their hair on the left side.  Each symbolizing that they have lost a loved one and which gender and generation they belong to. 

The procession begins with honoring the dead and then being greeted by the family.  The family is then responsible to feed the guests.  Instead of people bringing food, the family caters to the people coming.  Usually the family would have to prepare all the food but thanks to the times we hired people for the catering.  The guests can stay as long as they like and they will sit, eat and talk for hours.  The family also stays fairly close to the body.  All of the things are happening in the lower level of a hospital.  We are also staying in the hospital in a seperate room.

The atmosphere during this time is actually very light.  For this viewing, it didn't feel like a death but more of a congratulations; a celebration that he made it into heaven.  Many people came and visited from church, distant relatives and friends of different members of the family.  As they visit, they sign in a guestbook and bring an envelope with money for the family that remains on earth.  In the sitting area, people catch up with one another, you can hear laughter and chatter as they reminicse about times in the past and new developments in life.

On the third day, we had a funeral service at church.  Anytime they moved the body, the first grandson, me, would carry the portrait in the arrangement leading the procession of people.  The picture, followed by the casket, and the rest of the people.  Traditionally and historically, they would bury the body near the house and the oldest son would build a tent around the grave and live their for three years.  But, we don't do that anymore.  We will be cremating the body, and since my grandfather was a Korean war veteran, his ashes will be stored at a memorial.

In all of this, one of the craziest parts was watching the hospital attendants dress the body.  It was a very solemn thing to watch but also very amazing.  The Lord's hand was really on it, giving us favor.  The head-dresser was an expert in his field.  He had dressed the body of two of the presidents of Korea who had passed away in recent years.  We didn't ask for a special dressing but they gave us special treatment.  I wish I could post the picture, but because of the family's request I will not upload it. 

As best as I can describe: The first layer of clothing was traditional clothing and then they would wrap the body tight in a layer.  The last layer was of royalty.  By the end he was mummified with a blue color with 12 crosses from the head to the middle signifying the 12 tribes of Israel.  There was a blue cloth folded over in ripples following the crosses down signifying crossing over the Jordan river into the promised land.  There is a crown at the head and feet woven into the cloth symbolizing the crown of life and three sets of cloth of 3 different colors under the crosses.  These 3 sets symbolize Father, Son and Spirit, and the colors represent faith, hope and love.  As they finished wrapping the body, the final knot was in the shape of a flower under the feet.  This symbolized the rose of sharon for the walking in eternity is better than what we have in this life.

And that about covers it for the funeral.  Its not the full explanation and there are some variations.  I'll post more pictures later.

A change in plans

As for Circuit riders....hold that thought.



Picture and floral arrangement
for the viewing



Last night, around 10:30 PM Korea time, my grandfather passed away.  Although it was the primary reason for me being here it came as a shock.  The wave of grief and mourning that came over my family shouldn't have been unanticipated.  When I first arrived I learned that my grandfather had been in a coma for a week and that he was slowly declining.  It was strange to have arrived in Seoul for a funeral when he had not yet passed away.  But if I had not come early, I would not have been able to see him before he died.  Korean tradition doesn't allow open caskets for the viewing so I won't be seeing his physical body again. 



My uniform for the next
3 days


My family was on 24 hour watch at the nursing home with him, so that someone would be with him when he would pass.  My dad's younger brother was at the home keeping watch when his heart rate slowly declined until there was no more pulse.  The rest of the family arrived about 5 minutes after he had passed.  His body was still warm but slowly losing heat.  To me it felt like he was still there, sleeping,  the reality of it still hasn't settled in me yet.  He was in a deep sleep before he passed and now it seems like a continuation of it.  In some ways it is but also its so very different.

On Saturday, we decided that we would all stay a little longer so that we could be here for the funeral, not knowing he was going to pass away when he did.  My original flight day was July 25 but I have extended my stay in Korea until the 31st of July.  The doctors said that my grandpa would have up to a week left but he passed 4 days after we had arrived. 

Now, for circuit riders:  I will be missing 2 weeks of a 5 week seminar.  I'm not fully sure if I should finish it out or if I should just return and be along side the school.  Either way as of now my flight still returns to Kona so I will have some time to decide.  I will also be missing the birthday celebration of my grandfather on my mother's side.  But in it all I know that the Lord has me here for a purpose beyond the funeral that I am not aware of yet.

Death and Life

After a week of being in Circuit Riders I have been pulled out and sent to Seoul, Korea for a family emergency.  It was expected but the timing was abrupt.  My grandfather on my father's side is in decline with his health and will be passing away soon.  When I first was told about his condition I was told he wasn't doing well but was stable.  Upon arrival I learned that he is in a coma and slowly slipping towards death. 

I didn't really know him before and its been about 3-4 years since I last saw him.  So I'm not sure how I feel or what to feel.  It is strange to see an old man lying in bed in a sleep-like state and slowly withering away.  Since the last time I've seen him, his muscles have atrophied and he is literally skin and bones.  He isn't gone yet so it seems very strange that I am here for his funeral.  But even in this, the Lord is good.  I'm not sure whether to pray for healing or for him to go and be with God.  So that is a strange feeling as well.

Next week, my grandfather on my mother's side will be celebrating his 90th birthday.  He's a methodist pastor and has an incredible story of life with the Lord.  I am closer to him and would like to be there for his birthday.  The family on my mother's side will all be there from his six daughters, a son, several grand childern and great grand children from all over the country.  At this point I'm not sure if I'll be able to go because of timing and money.  Hopefully I'll have a chance to see him as well.  I know that his time is short and I do not know how much longer he will be with us.

As for the school of the circuit riders.......

(I still need support for the school and other fees and living expenses.  You can donate through the U of N or through this link: Paypal. Thanks)